Antwerp Stake Conference

This weekend we were invited to participate in the Antwerp Stake Conference. Elder Roche , a member of the 1^st quorum of the Seventy came as the visiting General Authority for their Stake Conference. He is from Portugal, and was so real and down to earth. It was an honor to be able to meet him, and participate together in Stake Conference. He told stories about his own life to teach an important principle.

We first heard him speak in the Saturday evening session. A member of the Stake Presidency spoke about the importance of FHE, family prayer, scripture study, and attending the temple. He helped us envision a four leaf clover with these 4 important parts of the leaves of the clover. Elder Roche completely gave a different talk than he was planning on. He felt impressed to talk about the importance of the things that had been talked about earlier in the meeting. He was able to solidify these 4 important things in the minds of the members. He shared the experience he had with his family and scripture study. He said how difficult it was to find a time to read together. First they tried after dinner, but that didn’t work. His two boys were falling asleep. Then they tried before dinner, and that didn’t work either, because his children were too hungry. They decided to try in the morning before he went to work. It was great the 1^st day, and then the second day their children were late. The third day it was only he and his wife. So they decided they needed to make a change. So they decided to go back to evening scripture study. This time it worked. The principle: be obedient and never give up. He talked for a long time about when he was bishop and then a Stake President. There were many couples that we struggling in their marriage. As a young 13 year-old, he was baptized, and was the only member of his family until his mother joined the church 10 years later. He remembers the words of Elder Wirthlin when he was a new member, maybe 14 years old. Elder Wirthlin invited husbands to write notes of love and appreciation to your wife, and leaving them on the mirror or in her shoes as a surprise. He also encouraged the men to buy flowers for their wives occasionally. Elder Rocha said, “I thought this is boring, this doesn’t apply to me.” But those are the words that I have remembered. So when he got married at 18 and his wife was 19 the only instruction book that he had about marriage was what he remembered Elder Wirthlin spoke about those many years before. So that is what he did. So as a Stake President, he counseled those who were struggling to use Elder Wirthlin’s advice. He would call them up and see if they were doing it. At first they thought he was just kidding. But everyday they would get a call from him, seeing if they were taking Elder Wirthlin’s advice. He also counseled them to do the four things on the shamrock. He said those that were struggling were the couples that were not having FHE together, reading their scriptures, temple attendance, and family prayer. He stressed the importance of these four things, and what a huge difference it can make in our lives.

On Sunday morning he shared another story from his own life. When he was first married they didn’t have enough money for an apartment of their own, so they moved in with his parents. That didn’t go well with his wife and his mother, and they knew they had to move. They were able to find an apartment that they could afford. They had enough money to pay the first month’s rent, but were discouraged when they found out that they had to have 2 months rent paid up front. They went to their bishop asking for help. The church was in it’s infancy in Portugal, and the bishop told them he had no way to help them, and sent them to the Stake President. The Stake President asked if they had heard of the law of tithing. He said that he had not. So the Stake President taught them about tithing. Well, it wasn’t quite what they were expecting. And Elder Rocha was a little bitter towards the church. But his wife said, Let us do what the Stake President has asked us to do. So they paid their tithing. A few months later, they found an apartment that was nicer and less money. They moved their only piece of furniture-his small single bed, and they were very happy. They use a large detergent box with a tray on it for their kitchen table, and sat on the floor. One day they found an advertisement for used furniture for sale. The seller was moving out of the country and needed to sell all of his furniture. They had enough money to buy the table and chairs. The seller tried to sell his couch, bookcase, tv, but Elder Rocha told the man that he had nothing to put in the bookcase, and that they only had enough for the kitchen table and chairs. The man thought for a minute, and then said, “I don’t know why I am doing this, but you can have all of the furniture for the price of the table and chairs.” There was the challenge of getting it moved, and after all was said and done the man moved all the furniture for the price of the table and chairs. The principle is obedience. They were greatly blessed by Heavenly Father.

I love his simple way of teaching! He taught a principle so profoundly through experiences in his own life. He would first suggest that we listen to the spirit, not to take notes, but to listen sensitively to what the Lord wanted us to learn.

It has been a real gift to have these two days with Elder Roche.